Let me fill you in on what you have missed, or better, what I have not posted....

It sure has been a long time since my last post. More than a year. Since that post I have been on so many trips, some good, some stressful, some relaxing and some just plain tiring.


My dh was so wonderful as to send me to my parents while he took a vacation to the desert. Isn't that wonderful?! While in 'the land of plenty' as we tend to call the USA, I had the pleasure of seeing almost all of my family. Little Miss and I traveled the Eastern Seaboard from Tampa to Atlanta so many times, I can almost tell you where to stop to potty and where NOT to!




I can tell you, that like those red poppies I love, you never know how resilient you are until there is a storm. I had times I thought I was going to be blown off the planet, either by single-parenting, which is for the birds, or from internal stresses. You never know how good or bad of a parent you are until you are under a microscope. Now, I am NOT saying I am a bad parent! No way! I am only stating that its just hard to have people you love speaking into your life during times like this. They know about your situation. But they are not LIVING it and do not KNOW what it is like. Trying to be mom and dad while dealing with MILES between you, SUCKS! I mean, I am the FUN parent! I am NOT the bad guy! I hate making rules, or enforcing them! Let me tell you, it is hard and frustrating and angering, and shows you how immature you really are! I mean, WHO argues with a 20 month old? A tired and worn out momma! It gets harder and harder to listen to all of the advice you hear. I mean, they mean well, and have my best at heart and love Little Miss more than they do me. That is not in doubt. In fact, if that was in doubt, I can tell you, I would have been back here, WAY earlier! Knowing how loved we were and cherished sure helped. So did SKYPE!


Ok, so we were blessed to SKYPE our daddy some times 2 or more times a day! I know, spoiled! There were some times though that we did not get to see him or even get an email from him. Those were harder than the parenting moments. I gave myself 48 hours of no contact before I started to freak out. Only had 1 epic freak out. And it had NOTHING to do with my hunny! LOL! Little Miss LOVED seeing her daddy on the computer! Depending on her activity, she either fed the computer a banana, or read a book, sometimes even looked behind it to find the rest of her daddy! She would kiss him and hug the screen. She would sit and color while I talked. We would eat with him. Several times, he would read to us before bed and sing a song with us. It was NOT the same, but it was nice!


Sadly, our daddy missed our trip to the ER for the split in Little Miss' head! We were headed shopping to some great little store in Atlanta. I called her to the closet to get her coat on, it was January and CHILLY. She was so excited! She LOVES to shop! She ran toward me and I was holding the door open so she could grab her coat. She tripped on her feet and hit her head right on the open face of the door edge. She screamed! I told her, its ok, baby and picked her up. She was STILL screaming. I thought, well, you are not hurt that bad, just fell on your knees. I sat on the bed with her to console my baby, and I saw her SKULL! I SCREAMED at my mother, GET IN THE CAR, RIGHT NOW! She was gathering up her stuff to leave as it was, she did not know what was going on. I started to PANIC. Here I am in this new town, CITY, and I don't even know where I am, or how to get to somewhere I know, or where to GO even if I did know any of that! I am seriously PANICKING! I mean, starting to get clammy and queasy. My mom is STILL NOT IN THE CAR! I SCREAM even LOUDER, GET IN THE CAR! She says, I am coming, its not that bad, its not even bleeding....
I told her, I know, its too deep to bleed, I can SEE HER SKULL! LET'S GO! She says, ok, here is a band-aid. Little Miss is no longer screaming, just doing that little hiccup inhale cry whimper of the screamed out. Well, until her momma starts hollering cause we are STILL NOT IN THE CAR! I tell my mom, I am going to call 911! LETS GO! She gets us in the car, we have only been with them for 5 days, and I plug in the GPS. It still thinks its in Tampa! GRRRR! Little Miss is still whimpering.... crying, says to her head, owwwwie....
Its now been HOURS since the event, more like 5 minutes, and we are FINALLY leaving the apartment. We head to the nearest ER, once we get the GPS in the correct city and state! Less than 4 miles! FINALLY! We pull up and Little Miss and I bail! My mom follows right behind me. We check in, go straight back and get her head x-rayed. No broken bones, no fractures or anything, OTHER THAN THE GAPING WOUND ON HER FOREHEAD! So, we wait for the injection of numbing medicine, Little Miss keeps pointing to her head and saying owwie. She is hungry and scared and her head hurts and I can DO nothing cause she cannot eat until they do this! Have I mentioned that the wound has swollen, not bled, and is an inch and a half tall?! It looks like she has a purple half a golf ball on her head with a giant gash in the center!
So, the mean, not really, nurse comes in and wraps my punkin in a sheet like a mummy! The doctor comes in too and stabs, not true, her in the head with this liquid and makes the gash swell even more and NOW it bleeds! It pours! (five drops) Thankfully they have covered it and Little Miss is no longer saying OWWWIE! After what felt like 2 hours, 15 minutes, they return to mummy-fy my girl and then stitch her up. 2 WHOLE sutures! She screams her head off, I cry, my momma tries to console us both, but no avail!
We get our discharge papers, cool blue gloves, and a nice bandage on her head! Thankfully the wound was more of a smash then a slice. Doctor said,  the smash kept it from bleeding and prevented all of us from FREAKING OUT! I LAUGHED! I asked, PREVENTED?! I think that is a relative word. I attempted to be calm for Little Miss. BUT, it was SOLELY my responsibility to keep her safe. AND solely on me to TELL HER DAD! I mean, HOW! He is in the desert!
Preventative emails. I let him know, we would be unavailable to SKYPE, this weekend, running around to do and yada yada! I was stalling. He knows me well enough to know I will tell him, just have to phrase it right and figure out HOW. I PRAYED. REALLY PRAYED.
On the second day after the event, remember, we SKYPE TWICE daily, I sent an email. Yes, I am a chicken. BUT, I know my hunny well enough to know that he needs time to process it all and VENT! AND NOT WHILE HEARING THIS LIVE ON THE COMPUTER WHILE ON VACATION IN THE DESERT!
I warned, Firstly: everyone is FINE.
Then briefly and calmly and without ANY embellishments, WITHOUT ANY EMBELLISHMENTS, gave him the bullets.
I waited to hear from him.
Day one, nothing.
Day two, nothing.
Day three, starting to REALLY freak out! 48 hour rule of  mine.........
LATE on day three, email response, or internet has been down since you sent me the information about Little Miss' head, GLAD you are both fine. Cannot wait to SKYPE you, Know she is in the best hands and sorry you had to deal with this without me. You are a wonderful wife and incredible mother.
I CRIED LIKE A BABY! Remember me praying, I mean PRAYING?! I took 2 days to tell him and God gave me 3 more! I did panic, but only cause I was ready to hear from him and heard nothing, not even an acknowledgement of the incident.
FINALLY, we got to see our daddy! Little Miss HUGGED and kissed him and tried to hold him! She showed him her head. He was not happy, but said, glad we got it taken car of so quickly and hope there is no visible scar. (I have a hard time finding it, and I KNOW where it is)


That was a tough event. God knew what I needed and gave it to me. I may seem like some tissue thin, well, I am kinda fat, delicate and waif of a red poppy, but I can still be seen waving in the wind, with my face to heaven waiting for the SON to shine on me, even  in the rain of life.


See?! I love red poppies......